you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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