The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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