I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
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