Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
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