there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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