Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize