God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Randomize
