we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
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