Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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