this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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