I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Randomize
