What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
