I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
