Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
