everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize