I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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