Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize
