ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
