Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
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