i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Randomize