It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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