When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize