Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
farters have to be the big spoon...
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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