Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
