We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
