the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
