You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize