dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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