He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
