Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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