Is it normal to miss your booty call?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
