What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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