I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
