Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
