I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Randomize
