If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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