? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
