I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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