Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
