im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
