Do vagina's smell?
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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