i'm signing you up for texting rehab
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
