I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
and she was petting her beer can
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Randomize
