worst night to have a conscience
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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