people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
