I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
