You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
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