even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Randomize