STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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