ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
